MARRIED!!

The very last post for this blog. These are a select few photos of our wedding day. It was a gorgeous day for all of us even with the rain.

Thanks to everyone for reading, but now is time to remain in the real world where I love each & every single moment of it. There is no longer any need for a padded room for me to escape too...I am finally at peace with who I am and I love that more then words or paper could ever tell.


Bye.

9 Days To Bliss!!

Well I am alive for those who had wondered...I am now living in Ohio in the USA. We have been here for 6 weeks and loved every single second of it! Eric & I marry in 9 days time...so as you can probably guess we have been flat out trying to get the last minute details all organized. The only thing left to decide is what hair style I am going to wear lol. Oh and I need to work on the something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. I have the new (dress) the old (my nans brooch) its the other two things I need to work out...considering blue will not go with what I am wearing.

Not much else to write -- well that isn't true - -there is plenty to say but its after 12am here (Eric is in the office tonight) and I am exhausted...also I am keeping it all for when I have the time to sit and type up our new blog.

Very little scrapping has been done -- nothing worth sharing that is for damn sure. Tonnes of photos have been taken -- some uploaded to an album on my facebook page, none will be put up here.

I Am Leaving On A Jet Plane............

Don't know when I will be back again! Yep that is right...it is time for me to leave Australia for good. We have our interview on Tuesday April 6th at the US Consulate in Sydney & Australia Post willing we will be leaving on Saturday 10th April 2010. I am beyond excited at this point! Time for us all to be happy & loved.

I have spent some well needed time with some amazing friends before I leave. I was asked to organise a farewell dinner & to let people know the date & time etc...well I did this & the 'friends' never replied so I decided that the real friends would make the effort to catch up with me before I left. Kinda sad to me that I have been in Sydney for 7 months & not one person has bothered to catch up at all! People who when they found out I was moving to Sydney and wanted to catch up never responded to emails etc. People have driven past quite a lot & never dropped a line to say ' hey lets have a coffee!!' So it has all contributed to feeling very lonely & abandoned by people who claimed to be friends *end of rant*

From Left - Jonathan, Jordan, Shrimpy, Sam, Chris, Emma & Bek
I caught up with my gorgeous best friend Fran last weekend & spent 2 laugh filled days with her, her wonderful man & kidlets. Leaving on Sunday tore my heart in two as this woman has been by my side through every major life event in the last 12 years. We have watched each others children grow up, supported each other through relationship dramas, major life changing events & now finally both of us finding the one man on this planet who completes us. I will miss her desperately when I leave but next year Dave & Fran will look at travelling to Ohio to Eric & I for their honeymoon....that will be awesome.
My gorgeous girl Bek & Sam (nieice by way of friends lol)

From Left: Me, Dave & Fran

The gorgeous Fran & I.

We have also been spending some time with the kids Godmother Lynne & her beautiful daughter Erin down in Wollongong....that has been wonderful!

Anyway, I guess this is my last post from Australia -- I will post once I get to my new home in Ohio for those interested.

Who knows one day I may even find the urge to scrap again once I am settled there.

Farewell 2009 -- HELLO 2010!!

Yes I know I am a bit late with this one...but my life is busy at the moment and this blog is low on the priority list.

After doing some reading of other blogs over the last few weeks...I have seen many ways that people have recapped their year of 2009. Favorite moments, favorite scrap booking layouts, favourite photos etc. Well my year was define by many moments, some I can share & some I can not...it was defined by those who were there when I needed them & they continue to be there. It was a year of disappointment, elation, love, laughter, happiness and new beginnings. It was my year to heal from past hurts, a year to forget those people who inflicted the hurt & move forward in a positive light. It was the year I learned to embrace ME! All of these thigs made it a tumultuous year for not just myself but for my children. I reconnected with a very dear friend, learned that it was OK to say 'HELP!' and most importantly that it is more then OK to have learned what the true meaning of love & friendship is.

So I will recap my favorite parts of 2009 in photos..there will be a few.

This is Jimmy & Nat in February 2009 -- they wanted some portraits taken in Maitland Park.

Justin began dialysis -- this was a BIG change for us all...and an important step for him.
I got back to my parents one day to find the most amazing display of love from a man who continues to astound me every day with his love for me:
I solidified the friendship I share with my daughter Rebekkah:

April saw one last photo shoot with my kids:
Jess celebrated her 6th birthday - the last one I would have with her.

Bek grew into a beautiful young lady:
Celebrated my last Mother's Day with all the kids:
Traveled to the USA to be with the man who holds my heart:
We moved to Sydney and celebrated Father's Day with my dad:
I tried to settle into taking photos again after our move to Sydney:

Eric traveled to Australia and we spent an amazing two weeks together:

While Eric was here we got engaged:
Justin graduated Year 10:
I celebrated my very last Australian Christmas with my children & parents:

So as you can see a heck of a lot happened in my 2009. There were other things in between all these events, but this was my year that was captured on camera.

2010 will see huge changes. I am moving to the USA in a few short months. This will mean monumental changes for everyone involved. It will also mean the closing of this blog in a month or so, it will mean less of my private life will be shared, facebook has already been tightened on who can see photos etc. Time to back away from the online life & live in the real world once I am in the USA and love every second of it. Who knows I may find the urge to scrap book once I am there.

Happy Holidays!

I hope everyone had an amazing Christmas. We all enjoyed ours here. It was our last one we will have here in Australia...thankfully it was not disgustingly hot even if it did rain. I loved the weather for the day. I got the only things I asked for ...all 4 of my children with me Christmas morning.

I woke up at 5am to spend some time on web cam with Eric where we opening our gifts together...he had bought me a gorgeous Dream catcher to help purge the bad dreams that have been around as well as two tank tops from Harley Davidson. I love them all & even wore the white tank top on Christmas day.

The kids woke up around 6:30am and we opened gifts with Eric on web cam...he got to see them open the gifts he had sent over as well as the ones his Mom sent. The kids loved it all! It was truly the most magical Christmas morning...lots of laughs, tonnes of love & just the right amount of Christmas magic.

We headed off to my parents place for lunch, and we all opened more gifts there. The only thing I really wanted was a family photo of all of us together. I took the tripod o capture such a moment & managed to get a few. We laughed plenty while trying to get these photos. We ate a yummy baked lunch (Roast Chicken, Baked Potatoes, Pumpkin & Sweet Potatoes, Peas & Corn & Gravy) no dessert as we were all full.

After lunch it was time for me to drive my baby girl Jessica up to Thornleigh to drop her off to her dad & step mother. Before we left my parents street Jess & I were both sobbing and she ended up crying herself to sleep. I did a lot of thinking all the way up there. I will miss my little girl more then I will ever be able to tell anyone, but the real eye opener was the things she said & things I was told when I dropped her off. Also her reaction to seeing her step mother as opposed to how she reacted with me..heart breaking beyond words. She would barely cuddle with me & I got one kiss the entire time she was here...her step mother got out of their car & Jess leapt into her arms & covered her in kisses....she stayed wrapped in her arms for the 25 minutes we were all talking...when they went inside the MacDonalds I sat crying in my car for the little girl it appears I have lost. I knew that there would be a gap between Jess & I due to me not being in her everyday life...but this hurt more then I can say. I guess considering I am moving to the USA in a few short months it is all a good thing...still hurts though.

Anyway, here are a couple of photos from my last Australian Christmas...


Trying to get a photo of my children with my parents on the back verandah...James playing goof ball with a grape, Dad playing Rudolph with a Nectarine & the rest laughing at them both.

The Brown Family, left to right: Jimmy, Bek, Mum, Jess, Justin, Dad & I.



My oldest 3 goof balls. These 3 kids have kept me sane for the most part...I know they will always be there and they know that I love them all dearly...even if they are goofy kids LOL They each have unique personalities that shine through & I just love their little quirks.

The kids & I. I love this photo, we had all been laughing for ages when I took it.

Jimmy & I. Jimmy was about to leave to celebrate Christmas with him girlfriend and I asked Bek to take a photo of he & I together. This is the only one she took where he wasn't pulling a funny face...We have had a rough year as mother & son due to other factors. We were always friends & for a while this year we barely spoke...but we seem to have turned a corner. Jimmy - if you read this I am proud of you as my son. You are turning into an amazing young man and I ask you to never change who you are for anyone. I love you sweetheart.

That is all for me...time to eat dinner.

The Ending Of An Era

That is right..the end of an era is upon us. My lovely padded room will become no more at the end of Summer here in Australia. I had been thinking about it for a little while especially in light of me moving to the USA. Eric & I had been thinking about how we can gain some much needed privacy once I am there...we have both had more then our fill of laptops, web cams, typing, screen, cables *sigh* pretty much all of it. So at the end of the Australian Summer this blog will be deleted permanently. It will be time to have some much needed time away from the internet. I can not wait. It may sound silly but I have never been so fed up with a computer....but when it is the tool that keeps your in touch with the man you love..you deal with it.

So those who still wish to know what I am up too -- there will be email and maybe in time I will make another blog that is strictly for my scrap booking, but no personal shares of our life will be posted in a public blog again. Sorry all but time to protect my family. For the family of mine who are left in Australia there will be special arrangements for them regarding web content...but not for public consumption. It is also my way of making it so that people from my past have absolutely NO way to spy on what I am doing because frankly it is none of their business...they didnt want anything to do with my children or myself after the divorce..so now you will not be able to spy on us either...sorry.

So for the rest of this blogs lifespan..no photos will be posted unless it is scrapping related and we all know my mojo has taken a nosedive. If you wish to keep in touch..I am on Facebook and MSN..or drop me an email.

*scrappy hugs*

Finally

Finished! I was putting together a rather large frame for my youngest daughter for Christmas. I have scrapped 9 photos into the frame. The photos have Bek, Shrimpy, Jimmy, Nat Eric & myself in them. It has taken me a couple of weeks to do this project because every single time I sat down to do it I would end up in tears. It is something that I have poured my heart into & I wanted to make it a special keepsake for Jessica as she grows. Also it was made so she never forgets just who is in her family as she lives her life with my ex husband & his family. I have written a letter on the back of the frame so that it is never lost. I am going to get the kids to write a letter for her on there as well so that she has a little something of each of us with her. The other reason I wrote the letter ON the frame is so that I know she will get it, nobody can throw it away on her. I don't think someone would throw it away but I really do not want to take the chance that she will never know how I felt when I did her frame. I am putting together another frame that will have photos of my parents and other photos of all of us in it for her, reminders that we love her & she is always in our hearts...well I hope that is how she will look at it.

In other great news -- USCIS have received our petition, they have cashed the check and we have our online NOA1 (Notice Of Action 1)...so now we wait. The estimate is it will be approved around the beginning of March...that will be here before we know it and it looks like we will fly out of Australia around the end of April early May...time can not pass fast enough for Eric & I to be back in one anothers arms where we belong. We have done some more shopping for the house via webcam as well as watching Eric start to get rooms ready. Bek's furniture arrived for her bedroom on Tuesday (Wednesday our time) and it is all set up & ready to go, so now she won't be sleeping on the floor LOL.

Shrimpy graduates from Year 10 on Monday...I can not believe that time has flown by so quickly. I will post a couple of pics after the event.

Not much else has been happening, life is merely days blending together but from now there are little steps to mark off the calendar while we wait....and those that do know me at all ...we all know I am far from patient...so this waiting game is driving me nuts LOL.

Scrappy Hugs